Saturday, August 10, 2013

FAKE FARTING DICK


DEAR ROOMMATE - 

NOT SURE WHAT'S MORE EMBARRASSING, THE FACT THAT YOU PRANKED ME WHILE I HAD MY DATE OVER...OR EXPLAINING WHY I LIVED WITH SOMEONE WHO OWNS A FART MACHINE. 

BTW, PERFECT TIMING...IT WENT OFF JUST AS HE WAS ABOUT TO GO DOWN ON ME. THANKS. YOU OWE ME A PRE MED STUDENT





DIVORCED DICKS


Dear Roommates:

The two of you have turned into the utterly lazy drunks since your wedding October 2012. Which is when you also stopped living like roommates and started living like two dirty hamsters in a cage and when approached about the situation you ignored your other roommates requests about cleaning up after yourselves. We got sick of cleaning up after you, and caring for you like children. So this is what has become of your living area in the upstairs portion of the house we share. I hope your happy with your selves. Oh and we recently found out that your sleeping in separate rooms, I guess divorce is in the future? Congrats! 


Sincerely,

Your (soon to be ex) roommates




 
Real Time Web Analytics