Dear Roommate,
I get shivers down my back everytime I hear you singing, "Shave and a Haircut -- Tooth Pubes!"
Please take the time to remove my toothbrush from your barber shop quartet.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
THIS WEEK'S "YOU WRITE THE LETTER" WINNER!!
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10 comments:
Dear Roommate,
I like eating hair pie, not brushing my teeth with it.
PS I used your beard trimmer to shave my taint. How's that feel on your goatee? Zing, Biatch!
how dare you use my comb on your pubes
Dear Roommate,
I think its time we play a little game of...one of these things is not like the other. Can you guess?!
Dear Roommate,
Please stop using anything blue. I told you that I have bluephobia. Blue toothbrush is so gay. I hate you.
PS I used your trimmer to shave your hamster. Random.
I know you stuck my toothbrush up your butt to get revenge for me stealing your girlfriend.
This won't get her back, genius.
Dear Roommate,
Remember that day you, me and Karl played with your dad's shrink ray/bathroom amenity gun and it turned us into a comb, beard trimmer and toothbrush. You know the day we said we'd never talk about. And remember your older brother came into the bathroom and shaved his pubes with me and Karl. And then he took you and shoved you in his rear cause he thought you were YOUR toothbrush and didn't even consider that you were ACTUALLY a horrible repercussion from your dad's shrink ray/ bathroom amenity gun.
Anyways, I saw these three random bathroom items next to each it made me think of you, Dick.
Dude -- there is only one kind of brush for hair. It's called a HAIR BRUSH. Stop using my f**king toothbrush to brush your oily, skank locks.
Dear Toothbrush,
It's over between us. I'm with Pube Trimmer now. He gives me the deep dicking I've been craving. I understand you're hurt, but please stop watching us have sex.
Sincerely,
Comb
P.S. We are never going to ask you to have a threesome. Stop hinting around about it.
Dear Roommate,
My toothbrush is made to clean my teeth; NOT your P-Hair trimmer.
P.S.
I gave Scott $1 the landscaper to put his junk in your coleslaw.
Dear Roommate,
I get shivers down my back everytime I hear you singing, "Shave and a Haircut -- Tooth Pubs!"
Please take the time to remove my toothbrush from your barber shop quartet.
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