Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Small Undies, Big Ass, Huge Dick

Dear Roommate,

Just because the first time we were getting rid of all the crap we didn't need we had a rental truck at the time... does NOT mean we only get rid of crap only when we have a rental truck. YOU HAVE WAY TOO MUCH SHIT SO GET IT OUT OF MY LIVING ROOM, KITCHEN, AND BATHROOM.

You also steal my underwear. It's one thing to steal a girl's underwear, but when you take them out of the dirty clothes hamper in my room... that's what we all call "creepy". It's also weird considering you've got a bigger ass than mine. I got a lock on my door so you're stop going into my room and stealing things (oh and denying it when I ask you if you've seen something, because you know very well I've never accused you of anything before), and then wearing my things, stretching them out because I'm an extra small/small while you're a medium/large...

Stop trying to convince everyone that I'm delusional and making things up because you never want to own up to anything. I have a mood disorder called Bipolar Disorder not a severe psychological disorder call psychosis or schizophrenia... PLUS I'M HEAVILY MEDICATED AND YOU'RE NOT. By the way, you STOLE my $700 pearl earrings, you didn't "borrow" them thinking I wouldn't mind. You also acknowledged that you went through my dirty underwear to make up the story that resulted in you going through my underwear drawer and finding said earrings. Funny, I had told you two or three days before hand how I never wear them because I'm scared of losing them, but they're insured. Hmm... and I don't make sense? Just because you got mad/disagree about the police report I filed against you doesn't make what you did okay. You were wrong, not me.

P.S. Quit making fun of my music because it's not some shitty music I heard on college radio. I'll listen to my Radiohead as fucking loud as I want to. Your emo music is whiny, not Thom Yorke. Whore.

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, time to adjust those meds.

Anonymous said...

So you're a male with pearl earrings??

I iz confushed.

Anonymous said...

She never said anything about being a male, not everyone posting on this site is a guy

Anonymous said...

if she needs to adjust those meds then so does everyone else on this site.

Anonymous said...

Wow. It's good to have the site back up. This is one of the all time greats. (Radiohead rocks.)

Anonymous said...

I know what she is going through...three of my personalities hate my roommate while one of mine is in love with her...What ya gonna do I guess...

Anonymous said...

May as well close the site now, 'cause you'll never get a better post.

Anonymous said...

Catfight! Can't believe someone didn't say it before me.

Anonymous said...

pics of the extra small/small please

Steph said...

Why is she still living there after her roommate stole her *used* undies and $700 pearls?

Anonymous said...

she probabaly doesnt even wear your used underwear. she proabbaly seals them in ziploc bags for freshness then sells them overseas in japan.

Anonymous said...

Post pics of you in thong, or stfu.

Anonymous said...

not all leases are month-to-month. some are 6-10 month leases. hard to break. poor girl.

Anonymous said...

The crazy ones are the best in bed.

Unknown said...

Wow...it kinda reminds me of a roommate I had. She'd go all psycho crazy and steal our shit, then when we'd call her out on it she'd blame it on being under medicated.

but, i did chuckle when reading this. twas great.

Anonymous said...

She insulted Thom Yorke? Kill her. Maybe you could strangle her with one of the tents she wears as undies.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

umm, kick her! what are you waiting for? no, wait. dont kick her, DROP kick her.
Lock your room.

Cheers,
Blair

Anonymous said...

Call 1-800-364-4144 to have a trained specialist match you with the perfect roommate. Our roommate finding services help straight and gay roommates finde rooms for rent all over the country.

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VABO said...

I was like 6 sentences into that, and it was clear....she has problems. Both have severe problems.

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